Phew!

All this mommying is keeping me pretty busy and tired. I've started a page just for Jacob and his developments for family and friends. If I find time, I'll try to update this blog occasionally:)

Just Passing Time

Well, I've been on Maternity leave for two weeks now, and look how well I've done keeping up with blogging! Ha.

My first week went by pretty quickly. I managed to get a lot of cleaning done (mostly motivated by the fact that there was going to be a lot of people in my house) and I kept pretty busy doing a bit of final shopping and nursery preparation. This week, however, has been much less productive and has felt longer, even though with the Holiday, it's really been a short week. I've been sleeping a lot and at weird times and intervals. I've noticed that I am consistently waking up after 2 or 3 hours of sleep, and waking up suddenly and alertly. My body has slowwwwed and I am experiencing a huge decrease in energy. All of this put together is a little frustrating, but at the same time I am standing back observing these changes with awe as I know that my body is in the final stretch of preparations to have this baby. I am increasingly excited to meet our little man and I cannot wait until I feel those first real contractions and the whole process actually begins.

Until then, which could be any moment from now to June 14th (god I hope I don't go that long), I am trying to do at least one productive thing each day. Yesterday I did a load of laundry, showered, and swiffered the floors (loooving my new swiffer wet jet!), and today I fooled around with the camera and took some pics of my belly. While it was pretty time and energy consuming, I did come out with a few pics that I like. I only wish I could have been on the other side of the camera actually looking at myself through the view finder. It is so hard to take pictures when you can't see where you are in the frame. I have so many ideas of what would make a great picture in my head, but when you can't control things like zoom, angle and are limited by a timer and how many books you can prop up to get the right height, those ideas are pretty much just a vague notion of what you actually end up with. Nonetheless, they're better than nothing.

Things left to "due" before Baby J's arrival:

*Buy a baby monitor

*Pack my Hospital bag

*Write up my birth plan

*Pick up a couple of Newborn onesies

*Buy nursing bras (yay fun)

*Cook and freeze some yummy meals (will wait till mom gets here for that)

*Be patient!

More Craftiness

Last night my creative juices kept a-flowin' and I decided to paint a set of canvases for the baby room. My idea 'stemmed' from a mural I saw on Design Inc. that was a tree made out of the alphabet. Ok, so I'm not really creative, but rather good at copying. The number canvas is all me though:)

Next weekend my parents are coming down from Mississauga and are bringing my baby furniture with them! I can't wait to get this room put together so I can just sit in my rocker and Ooo and Ahh over the cuteness of it all:)

And in other good news, today is the first time in over 2 years that my credit card balance reads 0$ !!! I have been waiting for this day for so long, and it feels so good to know that I finally paid it all off. It's just too bad that now all the money I've been setting aside each month for debt repayment won't be there to enjoy anymore since I'll be on maternity benefits soon. Sigh. the life of luxury will have to wait.

I Guess I'll Have to Do It Myself

Trying to shop for the items that you see your clearly in your mind, yet seem to not exist in real life, is really exhausting. So often I have a vision in my head about how something should look, and I'll have very specific ideas about items that I think must surely be available somewhere, only to find that what is in my mind is nowhere to be found-not in store, or on the expansive www. This of course leaves me feeling really frustrated, and also wishing that I had enough money to just go ahead and get what I want made custom. Maybe I'm watching too much Design Inc. It costs a lot of money to get things the way you want them.

My main frustration has been with the nursery, and trying to find the pieces I envision to make it perfect. Try to find the right colour of dust ruffle, in a contemporary yet classic pattern. Or the right picture to hang on the wall that is fun and quirky, but not overly baby. It's draining, and takes a lot of work, which is why I have decided to just throw in the towel and attempt to customize Baby J's nursery as much as I can with DIY projects. (yay!)

So yesterday, after a long shopping trip, I had a few ideas, and today I tackled some of my many planned DIY projects.

My first project originated from and idea I had in my head: spelling out Jacob in different coloured block letters behind the crib, suspended from satin ribbons. I have seen this done many times before, but wouldn't you know, the craft store didn't have all of the letters I needed. So instead I compromised (glad I did, because who wants to be like everyone else anyway?) and I found a plain white J, painted it to match our colours, and added a cute little dino detail to make it my own. Instead of hanging it on the wall, I mounted it on the nursery door. So cute, no?

For my second project, I knew I wanted to incorporate Dr. Seuss in the room somehow. While I still have an idea using a quotation from Oh The Places You'll Go, I decided to pick up a used copy of Dr. Seuss's ABC, slice out the J pages and frame them. (Gasp! I've destroyed a book. It wasn't as hard to do as I thought it would be-probably because it was only 5 bucks, but it still stabbed at my heart a little.) Anyway, I think the result is really cute, and again, it's personalized for our little man.

For my last project of the day, I wanted to make something to hand over the crib that was unique and that incorporated all of the colours I want to use in the bedding (a whole other nightmare). What I settled on was a painted canvas in blues and greens. It only took me about 15 minutes to do and when you look at it, it almost looks like a flower is coming out of the bottom corner ( at least I hope it does since that's what I was going for). I think it looks really sharp and I know that once the crib is in place and it is hung, it will go great with the finished room and give it a contemporary touch.

Future DIY projects on deck: Painting some raw wood shelves in blue, then green and sanding them for an old world feel; sewing a crib skirt and valence; painting 2 more canvases using more Dr. Seuss. I'm sure to have enough to keep me busy once I start my maternity leave on the 11th! Only 39 days to go!!

Baby Shower and a Baby's Room

This Easter weekend Paul and I took a roadtrip to Sudbury where my mom and sister held a baby shower for Baby Best. It was a much anticipated trip as I was able to see much of my extended family and spend some time with my grandmother-who is very excited that she will soon be a great grandma. It was really a great time, and filled with lots of yummy food and family. I really feel overwhelmed by the love I felt from everyone, and it is very clear when you attend one of these events how much people love babies! Baby Best, already spoiled, will have so many cute outfits to wear thanks to the love of his extended family.

One exceptionally heartfelt gift was an old cradle that my uncle took the time to refinish. It was the cradle given to my oldest cousin-the first grandchild- on my mom's side, and it has been slept in and loved by almost each cousin since then (including myself). My uncle managed to strip off three layers of old paint to restore it to its natural colour, and in the process, he discovered an inscription that was carved by my grandfather. While most of it is faded away, you can make out "Eugene and Edna", which just touches my heart to know that even though they are not around any more to meet their great grandchild, they are still connected to him and love him. While it will eventually be the cradle that I keep by my bed, it looks so adorable in the newly painted baby's room-don't you think?

Last week Paul and I finally finished painting the baby's room (when I say finally, I mean that it didn't really take us long, but it sure was a lot of work over the course of just a few days). Together we managed to successfully paint broad blue stripes on the walls. It was a task that I could not have executed so perfectly were it not for the engineering brains of Paul and his meticulous calculations and measurements. After several coats, and some questioning as to whether we made the right choice in colours, the tape was removed and we stood in awe of our accomplishment. Not one crooked stripe exists, and no leaks or bleeding of colours to speak of. I think we must have stood in the room for 20 minutes after we were finished just admiring how adorable it turned out. Now we just have to wait for our furniture to arrive in May and it will really feel like a home for our little man.

With all of these exciting things happening, I can almost forget about the pain I am in and the extra weight that I can see collecting all over my body.

Only 53 days (or less-fingers crossed) to go!!

This is the belly at 30 weeks. Now, a week later, I am positive it's grown even more. As the belly button becomes shallower, nights are becoming more difficult. For the past two days I have been extremely restless when trying to sleep, and I find I am tossing and turning all night to try and get comfortable. During the day, I am up and down every five minutes looking for a comfortable standing or sitting position. It's getting to be a little bit of a problem, but I think I'll get through it alright. Only 62 days to go! (yes, we're now down to counting the days-literally).

This weekend Paul and I started to paint the nursery! After hours of preparation and painting, it still isn't quite ready for its big reveal. I have abitiously chosen a strip pattern for the walls, so right now we are in the middle of measuring and taping. I have trusted Paul to do the math to get even and consistent stripes, and so far, the taping looks pretty straight. We'll just have to see once the tape comes off if we are masters of this finish. I am nervous since while researching how to do stripes right on the internet, there were many many comments about how difficult it is-with pictures to back them up.

I am excitedly awaiting this weekend (Yay Easter) and a trip to Sudbury where mom had planned a baby shower (yay again!). I will post more about that excitement on Monday (a day off for teachers (Yaaaaaayyyyyy!) :)

The Ever Growing Belly

At this point, sometimes I wish I had taken a picture in the same outfit for every week of the pregnancy, but I knew early on I would be too lazy to keep such a schedule, and here is the proof. I took the first picture of my stomach at 17 weeks, which was at Christmas. I pretty much just look (and felt) fat, but it was around this time that I started to notice a difference from my normal size. Since then, I've only taken 3 more pictures of my growth at 19, 22, and 28 weeks. (19 and 22 are pretty similar). It is really cool now to look at how big my belly has become and to know that it is because our little man is growing so fast. Right now he is around 3lbs and over 30cm in length.

I will try to take more pictures in these last 2 months since soon it will all be over, and I know I am going to miss this belly o' mine and want a reminder as to how it all went down.







(17 Weeks)

(19 Weeks)

(22 Weeks)

(28 Weeks)

The long stretch to the finish line...

This morning I received my weekly pregnancy update. I am now 30 weeks pregnant, and the title of the newsletter was : Tired of being pregnant yet?
I can't say that I am tired of being pregnant. I mean, it's a really amazing experience, and it is fun walking around with a nice round baby belly. I like the way I look pregnant. I like feeling the little life inside of me. I like indulging in whatever foods baby demands I eat:)

I do admit, however, to being tired. It has gotten to that oh so wonderful stage where I can't remove my wedding rings because I am swollen. My feet are huge, my shoes don't fit, and pretty much everything hurts. It is hard to sit comfortably, stand for long periods of time, or do much more than a short spurt of house work before I get winded. Sleeping is something that I will welcome any chance I get- and it wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have to heave my big belly over my body whenever I need to turn over, which is often because my bones and muscles are shifting and I am always sore.

I am not tired of being pregnant, but I certainly am feeling the effects that pregnancy has on my body. And though I know I will miss all of the new and exciting sensations of pregnancy when our little man is born, the next 10 weeks probably can't go fast enough.

It's a Boy! (officially)

So about 6 weeks ago, I went for my second ultrasound that was supposed to put my mind at ease about the health and sex of the baby. As it turned out, the technician was able to tell me that all looked well and on track-growth was good, placenta where it should be etc- but the little rascal was crossing its legs and wouldn't give up its identity to us. The technician said it looked to be a boy, but she was only around 70% certain.

With all the charm and persuasion I could muster, I asked my doctor if he would schedule another ultrasound for me at a later date so I could be reassured of the sex. He wasn't really convinced that it was a good enough reason to send me back, but I assured him that knowing how I was supposed to decorate the room was essential, and part of my first baby bonding experience. He was hesitant, but finally gave in and gave me the necessary requisition:)

Fast forward 6 weeks later, and with the ultrasound complete, I can now say with 100% certainty that we are definitely having a boy!! ( I was pretty sure in my heart all along, but I've stopped myself from shopping up a storm just to be sure). The technician was kind enough to take lots of measurements to make it look like it was an ultrasound that was actually needed (yay, no bill!) and we were able to get two really great pictures of our little boy to Ooo and Aww over for the final stretch of this pregnancy.

I am really excited to meet our little man, and looking at these two pics, I am even more excited to see what he's going to look like. I mean, check out the lips he's sporting in the first picture. Little dude's going to be goood loookin' :-)

After the ultrasound, which was at the hospital where I will be delivering, we were able to go up to the maternity floor and take a tour of the different rooms, which I am very glad we did. They have a really compact area, which is good for family and friends that will be around before and after the birth, and all of their rooms are huge, bright and private (such a luxury). I made sure to see the large jacuzzi tub that I know I will be using, and to talk about various alternatives to pain management aside from an epidural. Overall, yesterday was a wonderful day, and now I can turn my attention and effort to cleaning out the baby's room, and get started on my decorating:)

When one life ends, another begins...

A lot has happened in the past few weeks, and reflecting back on it all now, it seems like a blur-like something that I must have dreamed or imagined.

About a month ago we noticed that our cat Pouddy was not feeling very well. Thinking back now, it is clear that she was slowly showing signs of distress that we did not pick up on since probably the fall. It was a month ago that she was having stomach issues causing her to vomit and have troubles going to the bathroom. Over the course of the next few weeks, she got worse and stopped eating and drinking which made her dehydrated. We visited the vet several times, trying different medications and appetite stimulants-none of which really did anything, trying to figure out what was wrong with her, though we were unable to diagnose her with any certainty.

In the end, with no progress being made, Paul and I had to make the very difficult decision to say goodbye to our sweet Pouds and end her suffering. Knowing that this was something we might have to do a short time into her illness, it did not make preparing for it any easier. In fact, it still seems that we did not have enough time to process the situation, and I wish that I had somehow taken more time to be with her-though I know that the last few days we had were spent by her side as much as possible. After the fact, the vet informed us that she had G.I. Lymphoma, which helped to ease our minds that we had made the right decision as aside from maybe a month or two more supported by steroid injections (not pleasant) she would not have recovered.

Pouddy was a member of our family-like a child to us. She's been a part of Paul's life since he moved into his first apartment, and I've been lucky to call her my lil' Pouds for the past 6.5 years. At close to 16 years old, she had a pretty priviledged life, and we'll miss her terribly.

Now, as Paul and I begin to prepare our home for the new life that will join us in less than three short months, we are remembering the wonderful life that we were so lucky to be a part of.

Baby Best
So, one of the reasons that I wanted to kick start some life back into this blog is because as bad as my blogging has been, so has my journaling, and I've yet to write down any of my thoughts and experiences on being pregnant.
I am embarassed of this fact, and more than ever I wish I had taken pen to paper, or keyboard to blog, much earlier.
I will start by saying that getting pregnant was something I was very anxious about. For years I have been waiting for the right time to have this experience, and now that I am living it ( wow it's really for real) I can hardly believe that soon we will have a child.
Baby Best was definitely planned, and after 6 years together, Paul and I knew that we were ready to take on the challenge of becoming parents. As the weeks quickly go by (25 already!), I am dreading all of the work that has yet to be completed (nursury, shopping, more belly growing). Long gone are my regular clothes, and already my maternity wear is feeling a little tighter everyday. ( I will try to keep reminding myself that every woman gains weight during pregnancy. Sigh)

Favorite milestones thus far: seeing the flutter of a heartbeat at our 8 week ultrasound, solidifying in my mind that there was actually a baby in there; Feeling flutters of movement early in the new year and Paul feeling the baby's first major round kicks, which were a case of baby hiccups; Seeing a much larger, more baby looking image of our possible son on the ultrasound monitor at 22 weeks- if you look carefully you can make out the cutest little baby nose; And most recently, switching the automatic grabbing of my belly when I feel the baby move to watching the movements ripple across my stomach- This morning it looked like a wave as baby shifted his foot.

Being a mother is one of the only certainties I have ever had in my life. I know without a doubt that this is something I am meant to do, and waiting, as seems to always be the case, is the hardest part. Hopefully this blog will inspire me to continue to document this experience and pass those days of anticipation.

The Resurrection

Very soon after my last post, an entire-and ridiculously long- two years ago, I became caught up in the final days of school, only to then fall into the glory days of summer and the stressful yet fun days of wedding planning. I basically quit the blogging life and never looked back-until now.
Recently I've been reading blogs of friends who I am unable to see, thanks to many many miles, and I've enjoyed a peak into their lives afar. Couple this with the fact that I am currently pregnant and wishing I could share a glimpse of my world with these friends, I decided to resurrect this ol' girl and start blogging again.
I'll do my best to stay updated, and hopefully this won't yet again become something I have embarrassingly neglected.

Josh Groban: My New Love

Last night Maddie and I went to see Josh Groban perform at the Corel Center ('scuse me, Scotiabank Place). I knew that I would enjoy the show, as a couple of years ago I was really into his first ablum, but I didn't expect to completely love it!

In keeping with his albums, Josh's voice was immaculate and was highlighted by the Ottawa Symphony as well as Josh's own band.

Uh-mazing.
Now, while Josh was breathtaking, in both voice and presence, it was his main violinist that made my night. This woman was phenomenal. I think the ultimate highlight of the night was her violin solo that broke out into a rocking version of "Cashmere".

I am a very satisfied customer, and though the tickets were a bit pricey, I strongly reccomend Josh to anyone who can afford to indulge.

I think tonight I shall continue my sweet dreams of Groban.

Procrastinating yet again, I thought I would post a little and update my blog to reflect my mood. I am getting antsy for spring and getting my wedding plans underway, so I thought I might change my colours a bit. Pink and green. Always a good, fresh choice.

I know I've been scant with details surrounding Paul's and my engagement, so here, for the first time in print, are some of the juicy highlights (Sorry it took me so long Kar).

The day that Paul proposed, I was sick sick sick. He had taken the day off while I went to school for a presentation. I was so dizzy and nauseous that I called Paul in the afternoon to pick me up and take me home. Now, on this fine day, February 13th, 2007, I would typically have been at school until 7pm. Paul knew this well, and had cleverly factored it in to his plans. Leave it up to me to be sick and interfere with the grand scheme.

When I came home, I almost immediately went to bed in an attempt to shake my illness. Once I awoke, some four hours later, I could smell that Paul was up to something in the kitchen.
In the kitchen, I found that Paul had bought me flowers, and had placed them in my favorite vase on the table. He was working away on dinner, and told me to just sit and relax while he prepared his romantic feast. For starters, Paul served lime sorbet champagne cocktails, topped with fresh mint. So fancy; so delicious. For dinner, Paul made a succulent t-bone steak with baked gruyere potatoes and a mixed green salad with homemade vinaigrette. He had also planned dessert to be rum bananas "en flambe" over hagen das vanilla ice cream, but we were so stuffed that we saved it for the next day.

During dinner, Paul wished me a happy Valentine's day, which was a day early, but still well received and appreciated. I assumed that the dinner was his gift, so once it was over I went to the couch to watch a movie (When a Man Loves a Woman appropriately enough). Paul came over and said he wasn't finished yet, and that he still had a card for me:)

The card was beautiful, saying all the right things. I remember being pretty impressed with the card selection. It started by saying something like" when we first met I wasn't looking for love, but I found a friend in you, and we fell in love and yadda yadda..." ( is it bad that I just yadda yadda'ed my engagement card?)
On the inside, Paul added a personal note, along the same lines, and at the bottom he said:
"I have an important question to ask you... Will you be my valentine?"
I smiled and said of course, and continued to read:
"Actually, I have a more important question to ask you...."
At which point I had to open a flap inside the card where it read:
"Will you be my wife? Love Paul "

I bawled. He got down on his knees and took the ring from his front pocket. While I bawled, I think I heard him ask me again, "will you marry me?" at which point I said of course, and wrapped my arms around his neck.
We cried a little together, and admired the ring that was now on my finger.
It was such a surreal moment, filled with excitement, joy, and relief. (Paul was nervous...so cute).
Since that night, exactly 4.5 years since our first date, I've been consumed with the fact that we are finally getting married. Even to see the ring on my finger now, still catches me off guard, and I have to stop and let it sink in again.

So there it is, for all those who have been waiting!
I promise not too get too sappy and consumed with weddings over the next year:)

PS. I am in love with the ring, and the fact that Paul picked it out all on his own. You did well my love. You did well.

Finally...

I know it happened two weeks ago, but I'm busy and lazy and forgetful (mostly lazy) and I have put off blogging about the fact that I'm Engaged!!!!


I'll pause a moment to let that sink in.


Paul and I are getting married. Seems unreal, believe me I know, but I'm going to be a Mrs.
Paul proposed exactly 4.5 years after our first date and he was very sneaky about it at that. So impressed with him-still!

Even now I am still not in the blogging sort of mood. School is crazy and all of my procrastinating time is filled with wedding details (yes already!) Stay tuned for updates and maybe even some details soon.

Till then.